


Difficult Relationships

by nanuk_dain



Series: Drift Compatible [17]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Eavesdropping, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Stacker and Herc comfort each other, Team Hot Dads, serious topics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-04
Updated: 2014-10-04
Packaged: 2018-02-19 22:02:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2404436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Herc talks to Stacker about the confrontation he had with Chuck in the Jaeger bay - and Chuck happens to involuntarily eavesdrop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Difficult Relationships

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bachaboska](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bachaboska/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Revelation](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2338445) by [nanuk_dain](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain). 



> 1) My first Pacific Rim fic ever - but not my last, I'm quite sure ^_^ It's inspired by a manip I made a few weeks ago of Chuck walking in on Herc and Stacker cuddling (see below). I hope you like what I made of it!
> 
> 2) This is a gift for Bachaboska because she loves the manip and wanted the story behind it. I hope it pleases you, my dear! ^^

***

[ ](http://ic.pics.livejournal.com/nanuk_dain/16335757/104714/104714_original.jpg) *

_Hong Kong Shatterdome, January 7th 2025_

 

Chuck turns down the corridor that leads to Pentecosts office, his stride fast and clipped. He's still angry at Raleigh and Mako. Those two idiots almost blew up the entire shatterdome because they aren't able to keep a stable drift - they shouldn't be in a Conn-Pod at all, especially not together.

He doesn't know what's going to happen now that they have proven their incompetence, since he stormed out of Pentecost's office - and right into that fistfight with _Ra_ leigh - before that decision had been announced. He needs to know, though, so Chuck decided to head to Pentecost's office and find out. His father had told him that Mako is grounded, but that doesn't actually resolve the situation - they still need somebody to pilot that old rust bucket. And besides Raleigh and Mako, there aren't many candidates left.

The door to Pentecost's office isn't quite closed, it stands ajar enough for Chuck to take it as an invitation to enter. The Marshal never leaves his door open when he doesn't want to be disturbed. Everybody knows that. 

Chuck is just reaching out with his hand to press against the heavy metal door when he hears his dad's voice coming from inside the office. Chuck stops his movement mid air. He's really not up for another confrontation with his old man, and he doesn't particularly want to take on both his dad and Pentecost together. 

He's just about to turn around and come back later when his dad's words filter through and he realises that this conversation is about _him_. Seems like a private conversation, not like a meeting between the Marshal and his second in command. Chuck remains standing where he is, too curious not to listen in and find out what this was about.

"... told me that I couldn't blame myself since I hadn't raised him to be anything. That ever since Angela died, he had spent more time with the Jaegers than with me." Chuck frowns at the words, recalling them from their... well, not exactly conversation, more like confrontation, a few hours ago. He didn't know his dad talks with anybody about stuff like that, least of all Pentecost. He should have figured, though, those two have been close for as long as he could remember. 

What really gets to him, though, is the tired, weary quality of his dad's voice. Chuck hasn't heard him sound like that before, almost as if he is... broken. It's as if he allows himself to show his weariness around Pentecost, as if he doesn't need to pretend to be untouched by the rather frequent clashes between Chuck and him. Chuck swallows and leans closer to catch the Marshal's answer.

"That's not all, is it?" Pentecost asks, his voice quiet.

There's a moment of silence before Chuck hears a deep, heartfelt sigh coming from his father. "He told me that the only reason we still talk is because we're drift compatible. That we actually didn't even need to talk at all."

Pentecost lets out a low whistle. "He knows how to hit where it really hurts, doesn't he?"

Herc gives a chuckle that sounds exasperated and a touch sad. "He sure does."

"Kids always know." Pentecost goes on, and it sounds like he's talking from experience. For a split second Chuck wonders what Mako said or did to get Pentecost where it hurts _him_ most. "And yet you can never stop worrying about them."

Herc snorts. "Tell me about it."

For a long moment there's only silence, and Chuck wonders if that's it, end of story. He can't help thinking about what his dad said, how he sounded, and how much of that is his fault. Of course Chuck knows that the frequent clashes between them don't leave his dad untouched - hell, they don't leave Chuck untouched, either - but he didn't know it got to Herc that much. Chuck just doesn't know how to behave differently anymore, it's a reflex to push his dad away. To prove that he doesn't need him. That Chuck's better than his dad. 

That Chuck would never have let his mom die, had he been in his father's stead when Sydney had been attacked.

"Sometimes I don't know what to do anymore, Stacks." It almost startles Chuck when he hears his father speak again, very quietly, very tired, and very weary. "I think I went wrong with him such a long time ago that there's actually no mending our relationship anymore."

"Come here." Never has Chuck heard that particular tone of voice on Pentecost. Caring, kind, tender. 

Loving.

And he's talking _to Chuck's dad_! Chuck froze.

He hears the muted thump of Herc's heavy boots on the floor, followed by the low rustling of clothes, and it's enough to pull him out of his stupor. His curiosity gets the better of him and he takes that final step that will allow him to peek through the crack of the door. Of course he risks them spotting him, but right now he doesn't care. He has to know it they are doing what he thinks they're doing.

When he manages to catch a glimpse of them, he finds them tangled in a tight embrace. His father has stepped up to Pentecost who's leaning against his desk. The Marshal's arms are wrapped around Herc's waist, his hands splayed out on Herc's broad back, moving in soothing little circles. Herc's forehead is resting on Pentecost's shoulder as if his head is too heavy to carry, his eyes closed and his hands buried in the fabric of Pentecost's suit jacket. Chuck notices how their breath is synchronized, how they seem to understand each other without words, and he can't help the sudden realisation that at some point, they must have drifted together.

They look so familiar and comfortable this close together, intimate in a way Chuck can't describe, and he feels a tinge of shame for watching them like this. It's a side of his father he hasn't known existed, and Chuck's not sure he has ever _wanted_ to know. That his dad's not the invincible hero Chuck has grown up thinking he is. That he is tired, weary, vulnerable. That he finds strength in Pentecost and only pain with Chuck.

It's a sickening thought that makes Chuck's stomach clench. He's glad when Pentecost starts speaking again and pulls him out of his unpleasant thoughts. "You know he loves you no matter what he says."

Herc's silent too long for Chuck's taste. He shouldn't have to think about how to answer that. "Sometimes it's hard to remember that."

The words are low, without accusation or malicious intent, just a simple statement, and Chuck feels as if he'd been punched in the stomach. Hard. He has to fight to keep from making a sound; it would have betrayed his eavesdropping position to the men inside the office.

Chuck watches his dad wrap his arms around Pentecost's waist before he continues speaking. "I think he will never forgive me for Angela's death."

Pentecost never stops the gentle, soothing caress of his hands on Herc's sides and back. "You know as well as I do that there was no other way for you to act."

Herc nods, but it's only a faint motion against Pentecost's shoulder. "Angie would never have forgiven me if I had come for her instead of Chuck. _I_ would never have forgiven _myself_."

"He's your son, Herc. There never really was a choice." Pentecost's voice is still quiet but there's unwavering certainty underneath its velvety sound. "She would have done the same thing in your stead and you wouldn't have wanted it any other way. It's what parents do. They protect their children no matter the cost."

"I know." Herc sighs and Chuck can see him lean into Stacker, accepting the comfort of his embrace. "Doesn't make living with the consequences any easier, though."

"Chuck doesn't understand." It's not a question, and somehow Chuck's sure it isn't the first time they've spoken about this. About him.

"How could he? He was ten years old when it happened. The only thing he saw was that I hadn't even tried to safe his mom." Herc scoffs. "And then I kept making mistakes until there was barely any basis for communication left between us. The Jaegers really were the only thing keeping us from losing contact, he was right about that."

"He was still wrong to say all those things to you. I don't say that you didn't make mistakes - which parent doesn't? - but you were a widower with a traumatized child and there was a war against monsters going on, basically on your doorstep. You did the best you could given the circumstances."

Herc raises his head off Pentecost's shoulder and looks at him. "You certainly did better with Mako."

"I'm not so sure about that. She is furious that I grounded her. Not at me, mind you, but at herself. Disappointed and angry and frustrated. She feels like she failed her parents, herself, me..." Now it's Pentecost who sighs deeply, his face showing the same weariness Chuck has seen on his dad only minutes ago. "No child should grow up carrying such thoughts into adulthood."

"It's not something you could have changed, Stacks. It's just who Mako is. She is strong and ambitious and fierce. I'm sure she was like that even before you adopted her." Herc's hand settles on Pentecost's cheek and makes him look at Herc. "You know it was the right decision to let her into the Conn-Pod, don't you?"

"I do." Pentecost admits. "I'm not sure where to go from here, though. You know what would have happened if she had fired the plasma canon inside the shatterdome. This wasn't just a mistake to learn from, this was actually an incredibly dangerous situation that could have had devastating consequences for all the people within the building. Not to mention in which position it would have left the PPDC and the Jaegers."

"I'm well aware of it." Chuck hears his dad say and he can't help a certain satisfaction that he isn't the only one unhappy with the events from this morning. But Herc's not done yet. "Mako is still young, inexperienced. She never had the opportunity to learn how to drift. It's very different for them than it was for us, Stacks. We grew into the system as it was evolving around us. They just get thrown into the cold water. And Raleigh wasn't the easiest person to have a first drift with, considering the trauma he has experienced. But Mako will learn, and she will be an amazing pilot. You must know that. She has all it takes."

Pentecost is quiet for a moment, then he gives Herc a small but heartfelt smile. "Thank you for the pep talk, Ranger Hansen."

Herc chuckles, but there's a wistful edge to it. "I felt like you needed it. I know what it feels like to worry about your kid, after all. I'm a champion in that matter."

"Sometimes it's easy to forget how young they still are. Chuck will grow older, he'll learn to understand things he doesn't understand now. You'll get through to him at some point."

"I hope so." Herc takes a deep breath before he lets it out with a sigh. "Sometimes I fear that it's too late to make things right between us. That we're too far gone."

"It's never too late, Herc." Pentecost replies, his voice sure and firm. "He's still here with you, isn't he?"

Chuck watches as his dad raises his head and touches his lips to Pentecost's, slow and light and chaste, yet somehow the gesture is more intimate than even a deep, passionate kiss would have been. "Thank you."

Pentecost touches his forehead to Herc's, their noses brushing against each other in a subtle caress. "Always."

Chuck can't help staring at them, how they stand in the sparsely decorated Marshal's office, wrapped into each other's arms and foreheads resting together. There's an atmosphere of peace around them that almost makes Chuck jealous, because he has never experienced such a feeling with anybody, especially not with his dad. 

It's a few minutes before Herc askes, "When's the briefing with Tendo?"

Pentecost checks his watch without letting go of Herc. "In ten minutes."

"We should probably get going, then." Herc slowly lets go of Pentecost and steps back. Chuck feels as if the sudden movement wakes him from a spell. He suddenly regains the power to move and he makes sure to be extra quiet when he pulls back from the door. It really won't do for his dad and Pentecost to catch him spying on them. 

He can't talk to the Marshal now. Chuck feels derailed, thrown. Not because of what he has seen - he's known for years that Pentecost and his dad have a... _thing_ going, they aren't nearly as subtle as they think they are. And he caught a glimpse of his dad's feeling in the Drift once. Well, he didn't need the visual confirmation, but he can live with it.

No, what really gets to him are all the things his dad said. Words he's never said to Chuck, and now that he has heard them, he realises how much of a difference they make. So does seeing what their conflicts do to his dad, how he blames himself for things that Chuck knows aren't his fault, although he's never let his dad know that he learned that when he grew older.

Chuck walks down the hallway, his pace slower than usual, deep in thoughts. He will come back later. He needs time to think, to digest all the things he's witnessed before he can face either his dad or Pentecost.

The Mako-Raleigh mess will have to wait a little longer.


End file.
